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爱——抑郁症的一剂良药-给力心理
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爱——抑郁症的一剂良药

爱——抑郁症的一剂良药
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发表时间:2015-04-16 11:13:28 273 0 0

抑郁着,像一条巨蟒将我的心紧紧盘踞,我浑浑噩噩,四分五裂,僵尸般不能动弹,默默的祈求着……,不知道什么时候那张血盆大口会将我吞噬。

作为一名抑郁患者,他(她)的痛苦可谓是不能为外人道也,这里的“不能”一方面是心中太多的苦痛有隐秘成份,一方面就算说了又有谁能明了。

药吃了又吃,病犯了又犯,谁能真正帮助他们,专科医生?心理治疗师?还是我们最亲近的家人和朋友。

尽管医生和治疗师使尽浑身解数,对于抑郁患者来说这还不能足够,他们更需要来自家庭的关怀,爱才是让他们情绪的天平不再失衡真正砝码。

家庭关怀指数的研究更说明了这一点,在临床中调查这一指数会用到家庭关怀指数问卷,主要测查患者对家庭功能的满意度。该量表包括了5个因子,即:适应度、合作度、成长度、情感度、亲密度。适应度是指家庭成员在遇到困难或危机时,能从家庭内外获得哪些资源,能否帮助其解决问题;合作度是指家庭成员间互相分担责任、解决问题和做决定的方式;成长度是指家庭成员在身心发展上得到其他成员的支持与引导的程度;情感度是指家庭成员间存在的相互关心、爱护的情感程度;亲密度是指家庭成员间在时间、空间、金钱等方面的共享程度。

研究显示,抑郁症患者家庭往往表现为低关怀度,其中低适应度表明家庭在处理问题、做出决定和解决危机时缺乏有效资源,手段僵化;低合作度、成长度表明家庭内部不能合理地分担责任,家庭成员在身心发展上得不到其他成员的有效支持与引导;低情感度表明家庭成员不能有效地表露自己被压抑的情感,不能识别和洞察他人的情感,成员间缺乏相互关心、爱护;低亲密度表明家庭成员间在时间、空间、金钱等方面的共享程度表现出极端化。让我们比照我们自己的家庭,调整家庭关怀指数,我们不必孤军奋战,适当时可以参加以改善家庭关系为目的的家庭心理治疗,或者更为广泛作用的调整人际模式的团体心理治疗。总之,只要有爱还在,就会让改变成为可能。

家庭要实施这份关怀和爱,就要从抑郁症患者的需求出发,如成人的抑郁症,最好从夫妻关系入手,因为对抑郁症患者而言,他的亲密伴侣,往往是他最重要的心理治疗师,因为这是她最亲近最安全的支持系统。

女性的抑郁往往与家庭、尤其是夫妻关系有关,她们本身的自我意识或自我评价,也是与身旁的人息息相关。当然也不乏幼年时期的创伤被激发、产后生活模式的重大改变以及其它应激事件等。那些让她们不能承受之重的不良事件,家庭不和睦下伴侣的不良行为都是使他们形成疾病的刺激因素。多陪他们聊聊天,有时可能只是默默的倾听就足够了,一起回忆曾经的美好时光。

而男性的自我意识,却往往基于工作或个人表现。升多少级、赚多少钱、拥有多大权力,运动技能如何了得,或多受女性崇拜,这些雄性作风的期望,往往令男士们忘记了他们也十分需要在情感上依靠别人,一旦遇上工作上的挫折,又无法向身边的人吐苦水,这时爱发挥作用的渠道又要体现为多体谅对方,陪伴他们从云梯上一级级下来,不需要太多的语言,像平时他们给我们肩膀那样,这时的他们也许只想在我们的怀里安静的休息,亦或孩子般的哭泣,远离尘世的纷扰。让好面子的男子汉们知道不管经历怎样的挫折,我们都会在这里守候,等着受伤的他们,——“这不是你的错!”

其实为抑郁患者可以做的还有很多,从医学护理的角度要督促他们坚持按时连续用药,特别是康复期的患者;注重饮食调理,科学合理配餐,多做些平时他们爱吃的饭菜;安静、舒适的环境也不可少,可以调整家中的布局,更换装饰的色彩,这些都是转换心情的好办法;帮助他们培养兴趣爱好,比如:旅行——

旅行能使人脱离造成抑郁的恶劣生活环境,获得心理学上所谓“移情易性”的效果。马克思说:“一种美好的心情比10剂良药更能解除生理上的痛楚和疲惫。”但是如果让抑郁的家属独自旅行可能会适得其反,还有不要带他们到曾经留下阴影的地方故地重游,抑郁患者爱回忆伤心的往事,总是活在过去的悲情中,旅行可以让他们建立新的感觉点。

回忆不仅仅都是误会,那些一起携手经历了生死的藏地行,那些边唱边和的篝火之夜,那些夕阳下海边写着爱的孔明灯,还有汶川地震幸存的孩子们为我们手舞着的《感恩的心》,告诉我们的爱人,——“你的生命是值得的!”

还有,还有。百合,郁金香。

鲜花不仅是爱的象征,承载浪漫的情怀,从心理的角度给患者生命力的启示,从医学的角度,芬芳的花香可以排除抑郁情绪,特别是玫瑰精油有疏肝减抑的作用,能够让人心情舒缓愉悦。

金刚经中有佛云:“凡所有相皆为虚妄”。看清世间真相之前,我们总要经历诸多障碍,从这里经过,福德如恒河沙般,有谁又能说抑郁的状态不是黎明前暂时的黑暗呢,所以只要希望在。

抑郁是个时代病。

爱就是这病的良药,只是我们需像天堂里的人那样,彼此慰藉。

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本文作者

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