A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Trying to get property 'avghousemoney' of non-object

Filename: controllers/Article.php

Line Number: 147

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 147
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Trying to get property 'avgmoney' of non-object

Filename: controllers/Article.php

Line Number: 147

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 147
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Warning

Message: Creating default object from empty value

Filename: controllers/Article.php

Line Number: 147

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 147
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$sex

Filename: controllers/Article.php

Line Number: 148

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 148
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

《三岁对了,一辈子就对了》——家里有个小魔头-给力心理
首页 > 心理文章 >

《三岁对了,一辈子就对了》——家里有个小魔头

《三岁对了,一辈子就对了》——家里有个小魔头
个人原创

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$faceJPG

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 9

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 9
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

https://yun.geilixinli.com/@!size60"/>

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$nickname

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 9

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 9
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

发表时间:2015-05-24 20:51:40 97 0 1

                           家里有个“小魔头”

    儿童出生时,儿童的意识是混沌和与万物浑然一体的,要从这样一个汪洋大海中脱离出来,是自我分离和发现自我的过程。分离是一个庞大的系统工程,八月的表现是这个系统工程的一个环节。

                                        ——孙瑞雪《捕捉儿童敏感期》

    我们常听到年轻的妈妈抱怨,孩子到了两岁多,越来越不好带了。自家的孩子就像是“大闹天宫”的“小魔头”,孩子只要不是在睡觉,就会天上地下的又跳又蹦。不是骑个小板凳当火车开,就是爬到沙发底下去找不知什么时候丢进去的玩具,要不就爬到爷爷或爸爸的背上,把他们当马骑;再有可能就是用彩笔把雪白的墙涂花,拿着CD盘反复的插进CD机里,直到把划花;家里的水池子是他们的最爱,经常弄得满地是水,浑身精湿;阳台上爷爷种的花可遭了殃,经常被小家伙揪片叶子,掐朵花,爷爷奶奶一批评,他们还不服气,会偷偷地掐得更多。给孩子洗手、洗脸,如果他不想洗,就给他洗不成,硬要给洗,他就咬自己的手;自己做了“坏”事,还不让别人说,一说要么哇哇大哭,坐在地上打滚,要么就大声说“不”来反抗。

我们经常纳闷,孩子到底是怎么啦?

    是什么让孩子成了“小魔头”?

    孩子从两岁左右开始,就会发现自己同周围的世界是分离的,他们的自我意识就会悄无声息地萌发,他们开始脱离父母的掌控,变得以自我为中心。

    随着孩子的自主运用能力越来越强,活动的范围也越来越大,他们的身心发展的趋势极速上升,当他们具备独立行走的能力后,他们就开始挣脱父母的怀抱,憧憬着独“闯”天下。他们的好奇心也越随之越发的强烈,他们会根据自己的偏爱和喜好来决定自己的行动,不愿受父母的约束和控制,随之而来的,他们的反抗行为也日益增多,他们一刻不停地形成自己,排除他物,大声地说出“不”,告诉别人“这是我的”,他们坚定不移得坚持着自己的看法。

    在这个时期,孩子的想法非常多,他们想尝试很多东西,他们反抗着父母和大人的看管,独立地去“探索”他未知的、大人认为“幼儿不宜”的角落。在我们大人看来就是在搞“破坏”。

用爱和宽容对待孩子的“破坏”行为。

孩子满屋乱跑,到处“探索”,我们很多年轻的父母本能的反应就是要保护孩子,限制他们的行为,用好话或好东西诱惑孩子,企图转移他们的注意力,有的甚至大声的训斥或用武力“征服”孩子。父母们可能不清楚,这样的做法会伤害孩子敏感的心灵。我们强行让孩子按照我们的想法去做事,其实这是在“奴役”孩子。孩子可能变乖了、安静了,但是,我们可能亲手“扼杀”了一个爱因斯坦或牛顿。

如果我们能尊重孩子,在保护孩子的前提下,给孩子充分的自由,或许,孩子在我们的爱和包容之下,培养出良好的创新能力和探索精神。

    爱孩子,就是给他们“当家作主”的机会,认同他们的行为,宽容他们的探索活动。比如,孩子要把新买的玩具跑车拆掉,我们一般会疼惜玩具,把玩具放到孩子够不到的地方。当我们看了这本书后,我们就应该明白,和孩子的探索精神比起来,一个玩具汽车的价值是微乎其微的。

    把握时机,因势利导,对孩子的行为进行正确引导。

    如果我们家的“小魔头”的做法是合理的,比如孩子在墙上画画,可能孩子的绘画敏感期到了,我们就有必要给孩子准备好画纸和画笔,或者把画纸贴到墙上,鼓励孩子在纸上画。

    如果“小魔头”的行为预示着可能有危险,我们也应该避免当面斥责,因为孩子听不进反面的话,他们会用反抗或者报复来达到自己的目的。孩子喜欢摆弄刀具一类的东西,我们可以转移孩子的注意力,可以打开电视看他喜欢的节目,也可以带他出去玩儿,给他一个喜欢的玩具等等。如果孩子非要去摸暖水壶,或者燃气灶的火,我们可以拿着他的受靠近,当他感到烫时,就会停止这些行为。

    有些“小魔头”很会恶作剧,他会一边做“坏”事一边观察我们的反应,然后等着大人发作,他就会乐得边跑边逗大人。这时候,我们只当做什么都没看见,他们就会觉得没趣,停止这些破坏行为。

    当然,必要的时候,我们还是要学会说“不”。当孩子的行为确实存在很大的危险或者会影响孩子的成长的时候,我们一定要说“不”,让孩子学会遵守规则、学会遵从权威。但说“不”到时候,我们一定要考虑到孩子的心理承受能力。

    特别提醒

    中国有句俗话叫“三岁看大”,两三岁的孩子正是自我意识形成的时期,也是今后形成健全人格的关键时期,我们一定要有足够的耐心和爱心,宽容地对待孩子的一些“过分”行为。尽量采用温和的方法,给孩子充分的自由发展的机会。一旦我们约束过多,就会限制孩子的正常发展,将来可能形成自卑退缩的人格;如果放任不管,也会让孩子形成目中无人,完全以自我为中心的人格特点。

0人已踩 1人已赞
/">

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$nickname

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 59

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 59
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

本文作者

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$city

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 63

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 63
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$birthday

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 64

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 64
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

0岁
ID:

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$ID

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 66

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 66
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

公益助人

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$freeanswer

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 68

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 68
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

收费助人

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$servicenum

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 68

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 68
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$summary

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 75

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 75
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$longnum

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 81

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 81
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

长程个案

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$addorder

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 82

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 82
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

%

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$addorder

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 83

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 83
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$addorder

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 85

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 85
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

续单率

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$callhours

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 89

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 89
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

咨询时
0 性价比

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$articlenum

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 98

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 98
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

原创文章
作者文章
对方反抗的不是内容,是语气和态度——节选我的书《幸福婚姻心理学》
除了语言沟通之外,还有一种很重要的沟通方式:非言语沟通。在生活中,我们常常通过一种不那么直接的方式获取他人的反应信息。譬如通过面部表情、目光接触、身体动作和接触,还有语音、语调、语气来了解对方的内心想法,甚至在他人试图掩藏他们最真实的感受时,都会通过非言语信息的方式泄密。
624 5 1
远离极端的人,他(她)将是你的噩梦——选自我的书《幸福婚姻心理学》
一个人的爱越狂热,依赖之心就越重,控制欲就会越强,他们狂热地爱着对方,希望对方按照自己的意愿对待自己,如果有一天对方没有达到他们的要求,他们就会异常愤怒,用极端方式来威胁对方,以此达到自己控制对方的目的。
985 10 8
心理咨询的效果之——诚信
诚信,是社会的规则,也是为人的标准,没有规则的世界,必然是混乱的,他们的内心更是无序的,而且她们内心是自卑的,觉得自己是不应该被尊重和信任的,所以才会把自己的生活搞得很混乱,因为我们现在所过的生活都是与我们内心期望的,我们现实的世界,是与我们内心世界一致的。 所以,在
2847 31 5

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$ID

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 118

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 118
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

/" class="a_home">作者主页
语音通话

A PHP Error was encountered

Severity: Notice

Message: Undefined property: stdClass::$ID

Filename: article/detail.php

Line Number: 121

Backtrace:

File: /newgeili2020/front/views/article/detail.php
Line: 121
Function: _error_handler

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 167
Function: view

File: /newgeili2020/front/controllers/Article.php
Line: 187
Function: _detail_pc

File: /newgeili2020/index.php
Line: 344
Function: require_once

)">私聊
相关阅读更多

服务与支持

给力心理APP


给力心理
APP