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“同学会”是婚姻的杀手吗?-给力心理
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“同学会”是婚姻的杀手吗?

“同学会”是婚姻的杀手吗?
个人原创

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发表时间:2016-03-25 23:44:03 281 0 0

    一提到同学会,现在越来越多的人似乎并不太感兴趣了。在很多人眼里,现在的同学聚会俨然少了很多纯真的同学情,取而代之的正越来越多地被贴上了一些负面的标签,比如:炫耀、攀比、装逼、把妹...... 
    那么,“拆散一对是一对“究竟是同学会上的玩笑,还是真有其事呢? 
    前两天,有个新闻也传遍了各大网站。40岁的周晴女士(化名)就恨透了同学会,她的两段婚姻都因同学会而破裂,前夫在同学会上重遇初恋,现任丈夫同学会后和初中女同学搞暧昧,坚持要离婚。现在,“同学会”三个字已成了她的噩梦。她不懂,联络老同学感情的聚会,为何成了婚姻杀手? 
    今天,心理咨询师老周就来跟各位看客分享下这背后的缘由。一般情况下,同学聚会高频期在大学毕业走入社会5-15年间,而此时的各位大都结婚10年以上,婚姻生活通常显示以下几个特征:
    1. 审美疲劳期。婚姻经历七年之痒后,看着对方很难有恋爱时期心动的感觉,甚至牵着对方的手好比左手牵着右手。何况有些妻子结婚后勤俭持家,连化妆品都省着不用了,甚至慢慢都变成了黄脸婆。而同学聚会上,大家可都是打扮的光鲜亮丽,前后一对比,颜值高低给视觉上的冲击显而易见。 
    2. 情感真空期。结婚多年后,尤其有了小孩后,夫妻的关注焦点基本上转移到孩子的身上,忽略了彼此的情感需求。而同学聚会上,曾经的初恋时光重新被勾起回忆。 
    3. 脱贫致富期。早期的生活大都比较拮据,此时的他们突然变成有钱人了,那怎样才能凸显自己是一个有钱人呢?很多人认为找情人是他们事业有成的标志,而老同学又比较熟悉,容易以开玩笑的方式切入,也没有什么顾虑,因为即使被拒绝也完全可以说”很抱歉,昨晚喝多了“而给自己一个合理的台阶下。 
    4. 刺激新鲜期。人到中年,家庭和工作都进入了一个稳定期。但是长时间风平浪静的生活使得内心开始变得不安分起来。正所谓”饱暖思淫欲“,这个时候开始渴望寻求一种刺激感和新鲜感,而同学会刚好提供了一个平台和机会。 
    当然,以上几个方面最多也只能是诱导因素。正所谓”苍蝇不叮无缝的蛋“,与其为外界诱因忧心忡忡,不如用心去经营自己的婚姻才是王道做法。 

作者:周海,国家二级心理咨询师,企业EAP培训师。
擅长咨询和培训领域:情绪疏导、职场困惑、恋爱情感、家庭婚姻、亲子关系等。
咨询预约:QQ:1336250639;微信:zhouhaiv5;手机13540648581。联系请说明心理咨询或培训。

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“同学会”是婚姻的杀手吗?
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